I wrote this poem about 3 years ago. I write poems to understand how I feel. Sometimes I can’t figure out how I feel, I can’t name it, or claim it. And I don’t know what to do about it. So I write. I write in the notes section in my phone. And then I love finding the medicine the poem offers later. So here’s a poem I wrote when I wanted everything to be different. It’s my offering for the day! AND I LOVE YOU.
I look for change
I look for change, I long for change.
But what is it that I really want to change
My bank account
My body
My success
My opportunities
The world and people around me.
I long for change. And yet, I have it.
My bank account changes daily
Yikes.
My body functions with more ease than a year ago — even if I don’t feel as attractive, and my underwear keeps getting bigger—it has changed
My success is and always will be subjective, so at this point she’s a shiny object and I’m the magpie, and it’s everchanging
And in the past, if I’m really honest, a lack of apparent opportunities has always yielded projects filled with joy
And I don’t actually want to rob the world of its autonomy, even if I do want to just a little bit.
So my acceptance is the only thing that truly needs to change. Or rather, acceptance is the only worthwhile focus to put in the energy to change.
Why?
Because damn it all to hell,
Accepting myself exactly as is
Accepting others, the world, my work,
Accepting what IS in every moment–exactly as it is, in that moment–
As well as: the importance of ritual and why I’ll fight people over Martha Stewart
This girl LOVES being festive.
And this year WAS THE BEST HALLOWEEN EVER. I am PROFESSIONALLY FESTIVE, so after you partake in some of these fun photos, I’ll share my
8 Tips for being festive AF (Alison Faulkner)
Even if I don’t love dressing up when it is assigned.I love making little scenesIt’s the only type of cleaning I’ve ever been capable ofThe type of cleaning where you clear everything away so you have space for a nice decorative sceneI ADORE making things. It’s like a little world in my hands.I like moving things around. Making new scenes. I basically decorate my house to set the stage for party and holiday decor. All the the shelves, candles, and riff raff can be rotated for optimum FUN. Any time I can hide a lil friend somewhere, I do!Consider me your favorite WREATH INFLUENCER I thrifted this faux candy apply, and put “not poisoned” stickers on it. STILL WAITING FOR AN AWARD.Those pumpkins are from Target a few years ago from the dollar spot. Good for wreaths, decor and cuteness.My rococo inspired Haunted Palace was A DELIGHT to make this year!I spray painted this craft house black nearly a decade ago, and this year went all in.This creepy head was a thrifting find YEARS ago, and he’s lost an eye, but still continues to delightI’ve had the same 2 boxes of Halloween decor for 10+ years and I use the same things in new ways every year.If and when I see something I LOVE, like that moth candelabra, and if I have the $$$, I’ll go for it.
8 Tips for being festive AF (Alison Faulkner)
It’s my blog and I will get as philosophical about being festive AS I WANT TO! BECAUSE I believe that being festive is a core part of existing.
IN FACT, ritual plays such a huge part in the human experience, that sacred, traditional ritual is severely lacking in most people’s lives and is taking a toll on individuals, and society. I GET IT. Rituals in religion, frat houses, and when used as an excuse for outlandish or harmful behavior = bad.
BUT THERE is something crucial in the physical and symbolic acts of ritual. There’s a reason we do it, crave it, create and long for it!
Ritual plays a role in helping people transition. It acts a bridge between what was and what could be. It strengthens community, gives variety to life, and can help equip people with deeper learning and understanding during times of confusion and uncertainty. Think of how many rituals are put in place to help teens transition to adulthood–why? CUZ IT CONFUSING!
Seasons changing are always a good time for reflection and ritual, and Halloween originated from the ancient Celtic festival of Samhain, which is basically a celebration of harvest.
I love Halloween because I love feeding people. Ha! Which is basically a symbol of abundance, and wanting to share my harvest. WOULD YOU LOOK AT THAT! I love making crafts and having a reason to go all in on a theme. I deeply enjoy decorating as an artistic exercise, but also because it’s one of the only NOT depressing ways to clean and organize my home.
I am extremely defensive of Martha Stewart, she didn’t show up and say, “You’re trash if you don’t decorate like this.” She came on the scene (publishing, business, media) a scene where WOMEN WERE NOT WELCOME, and instead of a bunch of dudes selling doilies and recipe ideas (making money off of us girls), Martha took her catering and events business and said, “Here’s what makes me feel like a badass homemaker, I’ll show you how to do it if you want: NOW LET’S GO.”
She elevates many domestic rituals to the level of art, and yet WE STILL FIND WAYS to just make her an example of women shaming women/ adding pressure. Consumer culture…I GET IT I GET IT, but KISS MY BUTT, you want to know what the biggest load of BS you can consume is?
THAT SHAMING SUCCESSFUL WOMEN, and women in general, and how that shaming of women and our appearance and self-worth ALWAYS, ALWAYS turns into a FOR profit game. So I love her, and did you know that when she was in prison she helped her fellow inmates with business ideas. A WOMAN OF THE PEOPLE.
TANGET ASIDE HERE ARE MY FESTIVE AF TIPS or
HOW TO BE FESTIVE BUT NOT OVERWHEMLED
MAKE IT FUN
Listen love, only YOU know what’s fun for you. (If you’ve forgotten what’s fun for you I’m sure I have a podcast about finding it,) but if decorating isn’t fun for you, let someone else in your house do it. Don’t like how they do it? MY, MY AREN’T WE DEMANDING?! I say this with love, get over it. I don’t let my kids help me decorate a ton. I used to feel SO BAD about this. But when they were little, it was stressful. Now they are bigger humans and I respect their aesthetic, I’ll give them areas, or entire scenes to be in charge of, IF THEY WANT. But I have to actually let them do it. It’s hard, and I often fuss with it behind their back, BUT I’M NOT A PERFECT PERSON. So I give you permission to outsource (I’ve decorated friends trees) or to be a decoration dictator.
SMALL THINGS COUNT
Don’t have the extra funds? Don’t want the extra mess? Maybe decide that you will bring in some branches with fall leaves into your home and put it in a vase once a week.
Maybe a single pumpkin is all you need.
Maybe you want to pick out your favorite candy and have it symbolize your gratitude for the people who come to your home. Put it out in a bowl and try not to eat it all. OR DO.
BE TACKY
I think we are severely suffering from an attack of boring beige and neutral tones. And now that some people are finally using color again, they are calling it, “dopamine dressing” or “maximalism” when really all it is FOLLOWING YOUR BLISS.
Same rule applies for being festive. Do you like traditional colors? Use them. Hate them? Don’t. FOLLOW YOUR BLISS. MY BLISS IS TACKY
SAVE STUFF
A nice plastic bin will do to keep your crap nicely from year to year, no need to be a hoarder! But waste not want not! I have the same plastic skeleton forks, pumpkin bins, and even candles I hot glued spiders to that I’ve been using for 10+ years. If I don’t use something 2-3 years in a row I get rid of it.
DON’T USE ALL THE STUFF
I save lots of things, but I also don’t use EVERY thing I have every year. I don’t always have the time, desire or band with to be SUPER festive. Some years you will go hard, others you’ll secretly judge all the festive people and think, “Wouldn’t it be nice to have all that time…”
TRADITIONS TAKE TIME
I have been trying to lure people to my home with White Chicken Chili for many moons! I make ALL this food each all Hallow’s eve, and sometimes forget to invite people, but usually I do, and still I make SO MUCH that doesn’t get eaten. I’ve had this dream of a house full of people and THIS YEAR IT HAPPENED. It took me YEARS to shift people’s Halloween night plans to include my dinner. BUT I NEVER GAVE UP! It takes time to be a festive Goddess!
DON’T CLEAN YOUR HOUSE
Or do! One of the only other ways I will clean is if people are coming over. Then again, I really only clean THEN because I like a fresh blank staging area for my dinner or decor.
I’ve had SO MANY PEOPLE say, “I love that you didn’t feel the need to clean…” when in fact, I spent a long time picking crap up. I’m not offended. I come from a long line of very high achieving, polite, upper crust hosting. So I used to GO NUTS. And it was not fun! So I got to a point where I thought, “If I’m making you food you can GET OVER the fact the living room isn’t picked up.”
PEOPLE WHO ARE FESTIVE, STAY FESTIVE
Much like my epiphany about clean cars, “People with clean cars, CLEAN THEIR CARS.” You need to realize that people like me, people who have lots of decor and handmade goods, are doing this like, ALL THE TIME. I live in this flow, I have 5-10 projects going at all times. I have projects I started years ago. Don’t compare yourself or expect yourself to become a different human. If you want to be more festive, you’ll dedicate more thought to it. If that’s what you want!
OK! THOUGHTS? I’m feeling a little like all over the place with ideas for content. I don’t know how to not go SO HARD. But I don’t want to overwhelm?? THOUGHTS??! LOVE YOU! xoxo
It’s hard being human, but here’s something that helps me!
Over the last five years, I’ve gone through one of the hardest but most necessary transitions of my adult life: learning how to be at home.
For most of my life, I’ve been out—working, teaching, traveling, meeting people, constantly moving. I wasn’t a “homebody” because home was just the place I crashed. People used to walk into my house and say, “Wow, I thought your space would be more… Alison.” But honestly, I wasn’t home enough to make it feel like mine.
For a long time, home was just something I maintained while living life somewhere else.
When I started spending more time at home—by choice, by circumstance, by necessity—I realized how disorienting that can be. Going from a team, an office, an external sense of accomplishment, to being home alone, responsible for my own energy and structure… it’s a big shift.
And then, recently, when my longtime remote employee and friend Mallory moved on after seven years, it felt like the final chapter closing on a business I’d been building for almost two decades. I was so proud of her and her Pickleball dreams, but also so sad. Because even when you know it’s right, endings are still endings. I’ve been reminding my coaching clients of this: you can grieve what’s over, even when you’re grateful for what’s next.
Finding Structure Through Sound
These days, what helps me feel grounded—when the house is quiet, when the kids are gone, when I’m not sure where to put my creative energy—is sound.
What I listen to is how I structure my day.
There’s not much else keeping time except school drop-offs and Eric’s work schedule, so what goes into my ears matters. It affects my mood, my productivity, and my sense of connection. It’s become the invisible scaffolding of my day.
For about twenty years, I was strictly a nonfiction reader—essays, memoirs, business, and personal development. Then around 2021, I burned out. I got sick, signed my book deal, and found myself unable to read anything that sounded like me. When you’re writing your own book, you start comparing every word. Should I have said it like that? Are they doing it better? I could feel myself spiraling, so I just stopped.
I put away the self-help and reached for fantasy—and, let’s be honest, fantasy smut. It was fun. It was escapism. It was healing in a way that surprised me. And when I couldn’t even do that, when I was really sick, I listened to gospel choirs and meditation music and Native American flute playlists. My nervous system just needed quiet beauty, not more ideas.
The Rhythm of My Day
Morning: Grounding and Focus
In the morning, I try to avoid my fantasy audiobooks. I need clarity, or to be able to connect to myself. So I often play music to pump me up or get me going.
The Michael Singer Podcast — soothing, present, idea-expanding.
Good Hang with Amy Poehler — creative, funny, and full of heart.
If I’m anxious, I don’t add words at all. I play mantra music or just sit in silence and let my body regulate before I start adding new thoughts.
Afternoon: Creativity and Decompression
After a few coaching calls or a consulting project (my current one is a multifamily real estate investment firm—basically a second language), my brain needs to unwind. That’s when I cue up the fantasy audiobook, go for a walk, or start making dinner.
And when I’m cooking alone, I close the kitchen door, turn on Diana Ross & The Supremes Greatest Hits, and let myself have my own rhythm again. It’s where I sing, recharge, and remind myself that creativity isn’t just work—it’s how I exist.
Evening: Inspiration and Rest
Later in the day, I often turn to something spiritual or inspiring—Elizabeth Gilbert, Martha Beck, Signs by Laura Lynne Jackson, or whatever feels like medicine that day. Again, it might be nonsense!
At night as I do art to unwind and fall asleep, I choose light audiobooks or rom-coms I’ve already read. The familiarity helps me drift off without missing anything important. And lately, as my nervous system has healed, I find myself driving in silence more often. The need for constant input is fading, which feels like its own kind of healing.
Protecting My Input
A big part of nervous-system regulation is protecting what comes in.
People sometimes ask why I’m not on Marco Polo or some other similar app. The truth? I don’t need another thing that makes me feel behind. I keep my communication pace intentional—slow enough that it works for my body and my family.
I don’t read a lot of news. I use Pinterest more than Instagram because it fuels my creativity instead of draining it. I’ve stopped trying to optimize every minute of my life. I’m no longer chasing efficiency; I’m cultivating presence.
Rebellion Days and Real Connection
Some mornings I wake up and decide it’s a rebellion day. I watch a show before work. I give myself permission not to be productive. And somehow, those days always give me the most life.
Because rebellion, for me, isn’t defiance—it’s how I find my spark again.
My social life looks different now too. It’s less coffee dates, more spontaneous chats with the gas-station clerk or the thrift-store friend I keep running into. It’s small but it’s real. And sometimes that’s all the connection I need.
The Takeaway
So, this is my “audio rotation.” It’s part nervous system care, part creative strategy, part rebellion.
I still give myself permission for rebellion days—the mornings I watch TV before work, the moments I say, “I don’t have to be productive to have worth.” If that’s what serves me that day.
And maybe that’s the whole point.
Whether I’m listening to mantra music, fantasy smut, Amy Poehler, or silence, what matters is that I’m tuning into myself.
The sound of my day is how I stay connected to my life.
Your listening habits can become your rhythm, your structure, your medicine.
Whether it’s a podcast that inspires you, a mantra that calms you, or silence that lets you breathe, what you put in your ears matters.
I call it my audio rotation—part nervous-system care, part creative fuel, part rebellion. It’s how I stay connected to my own life, one song, one chapter, and one quiet moment at a time.
I WOULD LOVE TO KNOW:
How do you people schedule your time? Do you have as many existential crisis as I do about it? PLEASE SHARE!
I see them–in a way, it’s like with my mind’s eye, but sometimes there is almost a form. It feels like a dense block of energy, like the air is heavier sometimes over people’s shoulders. That’s how it is for me. I know everyone’s experience is different.
I talk to them, they talk to me.
Talking about angels can seem taboo, too woo woo for some, but I honestly find them to be the most approachable of all the spiritual things–especially when so many people I work with, via one-on-one coaching or at a live event, are in a place of transition with God or their “religion.” Angels are a good neutral third party to the DIVINE that don’t evoke as much STUFF.
As I’ve thought A LOT about the messages I feel called or WANT to share, one thing on my heart has been ANGELS.
I want to just come out more boldly and tell you they saved my life. When I’ve been too hurt, mad, traumatized, confused or too sad to trust in, talk to, or want anything to do with God, angels held me. When I didn’t want to be on this earth anymore, they convinced me to stay.
My grandma’s have surrounded me, my friends who have passed have assured me they have an eye on my kids. My friend John who died so tragically and suddenly makes jokes with me and sends me nonsense songs ALL THE TIME.
I got really into flowers again when the angels showed up. They took me to the flowers, they knew the flowers could heal me, keep me on the earth, and help me find purpose and joy after a year or so of the darkest inner hell.
I’m not sure how little or much I want to share about my personal experiences, but I do want to tell you my PERSONAL OBSERVATIONS of how Angels operate. AND share some resources I’ve loved that have helped me draw closer.
Here’s what I know about how Angels work:
ALL OF THIS IS **GOSPEL ACCORDING TO ALISON** MEANING TAKE WHAT YOU WANT AND LEAVE THE REST!
IT’S ALL ENERGY BABY!
I adore Quantum Physics because I can’t quite understand it, but it FEELS true. HA! BUT everything is energy. You cannot destroy energy, it transfers, it transforms. I believe angels make sense because I believe in life after death and a caring creator, but ALSO because I believe in energy.
YOU ARE ALWAYS WORTHY
I don’t think you have to be sure about God, Goddess, or have some level of KNOWING to “earn” or be “worthy” to have access to angelic guidance. Meaning, if you don’t feel like you’re “allowed” to try to access angels because you’ve left your religion…GOD DOES NOT CARE. Sorry, this is my gospel, and that’s what I’ve found. God, Goddess, the Universe THEY ARE FOR YOU, they want Truth to bring you to your FULLNESS. So why on earth would they punish you for not finding them in a certain place? Angels are like Divine teammates, they are ALL ROOTING FOR YOU.
ASKING IS THE ONLY REQUIREMENT
You have access to angels based on ONE SIMPLE THING: ASK.
Ask for them, ask for their help. Ask for a sign, ask for a confirmation. Tell them you’re open. Look for them. If you ask, THEY WILL RESPOND. If you do not look for, or try to hear them, you might miss it. But that doesn’t mean nothing happened. Ask. ASK AND LOOK. That’s it.
ANGELS ARE NOT CREEPY STALKERS
Listen, I think free agency and privacy are important, and I KNOW angels do too. They are not going to spy on you, watch you do icky things, or invade your space. If you do not want or allow them in your space, they will keep their distance. I don’t know all of the logistics, GEESH, but I just feel like this is common sense. Don’t be stressed that you’re giving unfettered access.
ANGELS ARE FOR YOU- BUT NOT YOURS TO WEILD
I think a lot of people freak out over things like Tarot Cards, Angels, or even mediums because they see it all as some way to “tell the future” or control events in a specific way. I do not see it that way. I see symbols, messages, or inspired ideas as tools to understand complex topics. Symbols can invite us into a new understanding or thought. It’s the way the earth can communicate. Letters are symbols of sounds, which represent words. Nothing is EXACT, it is symbolic–so we can transcend physical limitations.
I do not believe that accessing angelic guidance is us mere mortals trying to play God or take His place. I see it like this: your Divine Team wants your FULLEST expansion of self. For you to be all you can be. They cannot stop your suffering, but they can be there with you in it. They will not go and smite someone for you, but they might be able to open your heart to insight so you can better understand.
ANGELS HAVE SPECIALTIES
I believe the gifts people have in life go with them. When I have needed help completing a project I have felt the presence of people who have passed who were experts in that thing. When I give a keynote and I’m freaking out about my makeup I talk to my Angel Whippy, who in life was a makeup artist. I ask her to inspire my hands and skills so I can feel more confident. I feel her with me. Telling me “Alison, you shine no matter what.” I don’t transform or embody her, I simply feel her encouragement.
AHHHHHH I have so much more to say, but I REALLY want to know what YOU guys know about angels? PLEASE SHARE! OK MAYBE I’LL wait to add my resources until I see if anyone has any questions or ideas to add?
BLOGGING IS SO FUN!!!!!! THANK YOU FOR BEING HERE! Comments are giving ME LIFE!!!
Can you even FREAKING imagine how excited a 2006 Alison was when she realized she could talk to the WORLD WIDE WEB via a…what’s that crazy, fun, word again? A blob? A blurb? Oh yes. A blog! A BLOG!
I guess if you don’t know me, it might be hard to imagine. So to quickly set the scene: I’m the middle child of 5, have incredibly high-achieving parents and siblings, have a large personality that seems to confuse most of the conventional, ambitious “normal” southern Californians and Utahns where I reside. And I have an undying love for clever naughty humor, HUMANS (like all of them) and being a STAR!
Finding out that I was allowed to talk to EVERYONE, with NO GATEKEEPER was akin to winning the lottery. The fact I could write, share nonsense, love, zingers and make myself laugh with my own absurdity just felt too good to be true. Not to mention, has anyone noticed I like talking to people?
I started a blog, called SHE BLOGS SHE BLOGS–but I still felt like a narcissist for doing it (was my neurosis ahead of the trend or what?!), so I told myself I was allowed to blog IF and only if my intention was to put love in the world.
Nearly 20 years later, a top 100 iTunes podcast, a nationally published book, 100 + keynotes, dozens of events serving thousands and thousands of people and the uprise of social media AS WE KNOW it, and officially in 2021 THE FUN HAD LEFT THE BUILDING.
But I’m happy to report that after a FULL and V. PAINFUL shift of life, relationships, work, priorities, healing, healing, and more healing, as well as letting go of everything I ever knew and counted on to affirm and validate me, I WANT TO TALK TO THE WORLD AGAIN!
And because deep in my little anarchist, chaos-loving, raccoon-identifying heart, I cannot STAND to be forced into conventions I find inefficient and counterproductive to the enlightenment of the SPECIES, I vote for decentralization of my time. AKA SOCIAL MEDIA AND ITS ALGORITHMS!
Here are the top 3 difference between 2006 Alison and 2025 Alison:
I DON’T NEED YOU, BUT BABY, OH BABY I WANT YOU
I’M NOT LOOKING FOR ANYONE OR ANYTHING TO GIVE ME PERMISSION
I’M AT HOME IN MY BODY, I KNOW MY POWER, I KNOW MY TRUTH
MY INTENTIONS:
SHARING IS CARING
I think I stopped believing this for a minute. Not because it’s NOT true, but because it wasn’t “caring” for myself to be “sharing” for everyone else. But now I see it more like: sharing and connecting to people is an integral part of what brings me true joy. We are a social species, and I have been so inspired, saved, and elevated by the words, art and attention from others. Because I have been given much, I too must give. But more importantly, I WANT to.
I CAN MAKE A DIFFERENCE
I live in Provo Utah. On the day Charlie Kirk was shot, I (who am SUPER cautious to over-consume news) learned about the shooting from an email from my child’s elementary school confirming that none of the students were on UVU campus during the time of the shooting. I was sitting on my pink velvet chaise lounge, trying to cobble together this very site, feeling defeated, irrelevant and frustrated. But after allowing myself a moment to cry, shout at God, and pause, I had this FULL BODY feeling and the thought:
“It’s time to stop pretending like you are not of service Alison. People are suffering, the world is divided, and YOU know you can help. It’s time to show up.”
I WANT TO BE OF SERVICE
Maybe I feel like it’s TIME because the shooting was literally 10 minutes away from my house. Maybe because I FINALLY HAVE THE CAPACITY again. Maybe it’s time because I needed to stop fretting about myself and my insecurities. Maybe it’s time because I’ve tried the alternative, meaning, I told myself, “You do not need to be ONLINE, and PUBLIC to be of service!” THIS IS SOOOO TRUE. I’ve been volunteering and showing up in my community. Active on boards and in schools, serving at funerals, bringing people meals and having fun with teenagers. It is good, it is great. But in my heart I KNOW I need to be building and creating on a larger scale to feel fulfilled. BECAUSE IT IS FUN FOR ME! I want to use and develop my gifts, and allow myself to go and do what I know is part of my path. To share words, art, and what I’ve learned about being truly, fully, ALIVE AND WELL.
TO BE CLEAR THIS IS V. MUCH SELF-SERVING
I do not need to delude myself, or excuse myself or explain myself for wanting to share online. I’m not giving myself permission to show up ONLY because I’m sharing love. I got to a point where I thought I had to completely rid myself of the need for outside validation. Super great, right? How noble! How wise!
MEH. It’s true that NO ONE, no success, no amount of money praise or validation was or will ever be ENOUGH to make me feel whole and “good.” Needing the validation of others to feel worthy to be alive and have needs = a lot of suffering.
BUT, as a wise friend and coach said to me a month ago, “You’re allowed to want it, Alison. To want praise and compliments and validation! It’s your love language, your gift. You love talking to people. You love being helpful. It makes you SO HAPPY, of course you want to connect and have fun with them. You’re allowed to like validation.”
In other words, it’s not the validation I miss, it’s the CONNECTION.
I know the best way for I, Alison Faulkner, to be of service AND find joy is to start talking.
WHY??? Because MY history has shown me: if I get a conversation going, and listen to the needs, questions and ideas of those who are interested in the conversation, I can then create offerings, events, courses or workshops to help meet the needs of the people I’m lucky enough to find and be found by.
